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We live in an era that constantly pushes us forward.
More performance.
More productivity.
More success.
We pursue goals, projects, income, relationships, experiences.
Yet, in the midst of this race, a question sometimes arises:
And the joy in all of this?
Not the fleeting pleasure of getting what we wanted.
But this simple feeling of being alive.
A few months ago, I was going through a tough time.
Projects, responsibilities, financial matters, the future, my son, my business.
My mind was spinning non-stop.
Then a sentence came to me:
«By focusing too much on the results, I forgot about the joy.»
I believe many women and men could say those words.
We've learned to work, to hold, to carry, to manage.
But who taught us to preserve our joy?
Our company is celebrating its achieved goals.
The degree, the career, the house, the successful project, the performance.
But joy, that cannot be measured.
No one asks:
«Have you had enough laughs this week?»
or
«When was the last time you had fun?»
And yet, an existence full of results is not necessarily an existence full of life.
For a long time, I thought I lacked energy. Then I thought I lacked time.
Today, I see things differently.
I think a part of me had stopped moving internally.
I kept on doing sport.
I was looking after my health.
But I was still pursuing a goal.
It wasn't the same as joy.
I remember a recent weekend.
Financial fears were present.
I felt heavy, trapped in my thoughts.
So I put on some music I deeply love. I started to move. Without choreography. Without objective.
My pelvis has started moving again.
I breathed.
And something changed.
My problems hadn't disappeared.
But my inner state, however, had changed.
Fear had given way to a form of confidence and lightness.
Joy was returning.
Long before the Tantra, there was the oriental dance.
For several years, she occupied a huge place in my life.
I danced almost every day.
I sometimes taught.
I was going on stage.
But it wasn't the technique that fascinated me. It was what it awakened.
Pelvic movement. Undulations.
Fluidity.
The simple pleasure of inhabiting one's body and celebrating life.
I felt alive.
For over seventeen years, I've been supporting women and men through Tantric massage.
When someone says to me:
«I'm exhausted»,
«I don't feel much anymore,»,
«I don't want anything anymore.,
I often experience shortness of breath, a contracted stomach, and a rigid pelvis.
As if all the energy used to stand up had progressively immobilised what connects us to the pleasure of existing.
The pelvis participates:
When we restore movement to this area of the body,
breathing becomes deeper,
The stomach is sagging
and the nervous system gradually leaves a state of alert.
Joy then reappears not as a fleeting excitement, but as a deep sense of life.
Stand up with your feet hip-width apart.
Breathe in.
Let your pelvis make a U shape backwards and to the left.
Then exhale slowly through pursed lips, shaping them into an 'O', and bring the U forward.
Feel the perineum contract at the end of your breath.
Then feel the perine relax on the inhale, forming the U shape again towards the back and to the right.
Don't look for performance.
Just seek the feeling.
Take the time to feel, to breathe and to inhabit this movement.
It helps to relax the pelvis and release tension.
And it proves very effective in intimacy for better feeling your partner.
In Tantric tradition, Shiva is sometimes depicted as the cosmic dancer.
He does not create the world by force.
He creates it by dancing.
This image reminds us that life is movement
and when everything freezes, something within us is impoverished.
Tantric massage is not just an exploration of sensuality.
It becomes a space where one can
Slow down,
breathe,
feel
and to reoccupy one's body.
Sometimes desire returns. Sometimes confidence returns.
But almost always, something starts circulating again:
Life.
We have learned to succeed.
We learned to produce.
We learned to hold on.
But we have sometimes forgotten to cultivate joy.
Perhaps the way back doesn't begin with a new project.
Perhaps it simply begins where we stopped feeling alive:
in the breath,
in motion,
in the basin,
in the pleasures of life.
Hajira Lamrabet
Founder of the Silk Touch® method,
Practitioner and trainer in Tantric massage.
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Because you deserve a respectful, in-depth and embodied approach.
Le Toucher de Soie invites you to explore your body in a deep and sensitive way, to awaken your vital energy and reconnect fully with yourself.
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